Stages of Becoming
By Britta Larsen
Book Launch | March 2026
How do we become who we are? What forces—family, school, friendships, love, work, identity, and loss—shape our development and sense of self? Stages of Becoming is a deeply personal exploration of this question, merging memoir with psychoeducation. Inspired by my graduate studies in mental health counseling at Northwestern University (Class of ’25), my favorite course, Human Growth & Development, and my quest to understand my habits, addictions, coping and defense mechanisms, and purpose, each chapter explores a stage of life through Erik Erikson’s psychosocial development theory, woven into my own life story.
Growing up as one of ten siblings in a diverse, multicultural family, I navigated both chaos and connection. These experiences, along with struggles with dyslexia, abuse, loneliness, and a lifelong search for intimacy, autonomy, and purpose, shaped my understanding of self, love, and belonging. Stages of Becoming explores my journey—from a big family in Boston to the fashion industry in NYC, from an HR executive to a founder and future therapist—through the lens of Erikson’s eight stages of human development. By revisiting pivotal moments, I examine how past experiences shape present choices and future possibilities.
Erikson’s theory suggests that each stage of life presents a conflict or crisis that must be resolved for personal growth. Successfully navigating these conflicts builds resilience and adaptive coping mechanisms, while unresolved issues may lead to emotional challenges and an incomplete sense of self. This book brings these concepts to life through personal experiences, showing how understanding our past can help us move forward with clarity and compassion.
Through self-reflection and psychological insights, Stages of Becoming is an exploration of family, identity, inclusion, and the ongoing quest for meaning in life and highlights how understanding our own development fosters clarity, healing, and purpose—reminding us that growth is a lifelong process.
It’s Britta
Chapter 1:
Infancy, 0 - 1 year
1976-1977
Trust vs. Mistrust (Stage 1) The first stage determines if infants can trust their caregivers to meet their needs. Success leads to trust and security; failure can result in mistrust, insecurity, fear, and difficulties forming healthy relationships later.
My first pic with my siblings, just a few hours old,1976
Chapter 2:
Toddlerhood, 1-3 years
1977-1979
Autonomy vs. Shame and Doubt (Stage 2) Toddlers learn to exercise independence. Encouragement fosters autonomy, while over-criticism can result in doubt and shame.
The youngest, but not for long.1977
Chapter 3:
Preschool, 3-6 years
1979-1982
Initiative vs. Guilt (Stage 3) Children begin to assert control and take initiative. Successfully balancing initiative with restraint leads to purpose, while excessive control can lead to guilt.
Welcome to Kindergarten, 1980 (2nd row, 3rd from left)
Chapter 4:
School Age, 6-12 years
1982-1988
Industry vs. Inferiority (Stage 4) Children develop a sense of competence through school and social interactions. Mastery of skills fosters a sense of industry, while failure results in feelings of inferiority.
4th grade, 1984
Chapter 5:
Adolescence, 12-18 years
1988-1994
Identity vs. Role Confusion (Stage 5) Adolescents explore their identity, trying to figure out who they are. Successfully resolving this crisis leads to a strong sense of self, while failure can result in role confusion.
The Fly Girls Dance Group, High School 1991 (2nd from bottom left)
Chapter 6:
Young Adulthood, 18-40 years
1994-2016
Intimacy vs. Isolation (Stage 6) In this stage, individuals seek deep, intimate relationships. Successful navigation leads to healthy relationships, while failure results in loneliness and isolation.
My wedding day, 2001. I was happily married at 25 yrs old and happily divorced at 45 yrs old.
Chapter 7:
Middle Adulthood, 40-65 years
2016-2041
Generativity vs. Stagnation (Stage 7) Adults focus on contributing to society and the next generation through work, family, or community involvement. Success leads to feelings of accomplishment, while failure results in stagnation.
CFDA Fashion Awards 2024
If Little Britta knew one day she’d be at the Fashion Awards…dreams do come true.
Epilogue:
Late Adulthood, 65+ years
2041+
Integrity vs. Despair (Stage 8) In the final stage, individuals reflect on their life. A sense of fulfillment leads to integrity, while regret results in despair. The goal of this stage is to achieve a sense of wisdom and acceptance, where individuals can look back on their lives with a sense of peace.
My childhood marked a complex family dynamic, with shared experiences of chaos and connection. These formative experiences shaped my values, work style, and deep interest in ensuring that all individuals—whether in families, society or the workplace—are seen, supported, and acknowledged, regardless of whether they stand out for exceptional achievements or struggles. You can read more about my family in Yale to Jail - Growing Up One of Ten Kids (somewhere in the middle) and how being in the middle made influenced my advocacy.
Cover of Parade Magazine ~ May 12, 1996